Listening...

Four days ago I had another one of those special evenings in which I had to confront my oldest son about how he plans to proceed with his life choices. I am obviously sugar coating the experience since in reality it all started at 12:30 a.m. when I was in the process of asking him to leave the house, go live with his mom, or find a way to obey a few simple but stringent rules that I have in place with regards to doing any illegal drug in my home. To my surprise, even though we both at the beginning could not see eye to eye and I had already called his mother requesting an emergency evacuation of the guilty party, after less than 30 minutes we were actually having a reasonable conversation. Not that either one of us gave in to the other's demands, that would be like getting off the seaplane and moving into Fantasy Island, but at least we were talking and not going nuts on each other. By 2:30 a.m. he had made his points, I had made mine, and we agreed to sleep on it to try to both find a way to survive this ordeal. In the past, most of what would of happened might of included a lot of screaming, some cursing, and very little understanding on either end. To you my dear reader, this might sound like no big deal and maybe in fact a bit of a pushover attitude from my part. To me, this is significant progress, the kind that makes you glad you kept it all under control.

The next day I did my morning routine of breakfast for the solo attendant brother, a drive to school, and eventually a long day at work. Finally, as I pulled into my garage returning from the sweat shop I saw my oldest son sitting in the corner of the front patio with five other friends just hanging out. I stepped out of my car ready to close the garage door behind me when he walked over to me and greeted me with a hug. He had actually gotten up from his social gathering and in front of all of his friends he came over and hugged me? I was amazed at this beautiful gesture and obviously returned the hug while asking how he was doing. "Oh, just sitting over there with a few friends talking..." he replied in such a normal, passive and pleasant tone that I almost did a double take to make sure wires were not coming out of the back of this cloned android that had replaced my son. He stepped back out to the same place he came from, I closed the garage door, walked into the house, and took a ten second pause to close my eyes and thank God for this momentary gift of peace and normalcy.

In fact, for the last four days, everything in my home has been in a state of calm, apparent order, and most of all peace. I am not saying that all the cups, and plates, and knives are in the right place, I am just enjoying a few days in which at least I have been able to find all the cups, and plates, and knives inside my home. I have theories, thoughts, and lots of suspicions, but I am not going to spoil the moment with any of them. It is like taking a bite of the most delicious double churned double fudge chocolate ice cream and then obviously not looking at the container's nutritional guide to have to discover how many grams of fat you have just consumed. Why would you do that anyway? You already ate the damn thing, why not enjoy it without any guilt.

Sometimes God answers back. I have mentioned to all of you how much I pray for this young man. I have even made pleads for you to pray for him too. First, thank you God for allowing me to savor the sweet taste of sanity and enjoy a bit of piece in my heart. Second, keep it coming, bless my son and bring your light into his mind, heart, and soul. As a scientist I can formulate more than a dozen reasons as to why this temporary moment of clarity is currently present in his life, but I choose to not do this today. Instead I choose to shut up and listen to God's voice instead. I have said this many times, when God is ready to make things better, they will become better. I refuse to bring a single negative thought to this post, much less type it. Today I will just listen and enjoy.

My only advice to you my dear reader is to consider doing the same when God makes a move in your life. You should probably thank Him and then allow it to happen on His terms. I find this moment to be the sweetest moment of all moments possible. This yummy treat is mine, no matter how short or long it lasts.

Dad